You feminist people, you with your mind control, will you never let up? What have you done to that sweet, innocent, naive little Maia? Jeez. Now she can’t even watch a simple documentary about cute penguins without getting all ired up about patriarchy? You hairy-legged lesbian misandrist harridans you. Gah. Will you never rest until all men are belly up in arctic waters?
Now, where did I put my chocolate?